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Words of Wisdom: College Advice – Relationships: God & People

I will be starting my first year of college and I’ve asked people on how their college experience was/ has been. I got some good information so I thought I would share it with you all as I know some of my readers are in the same boat as me.  It’s long because it’s from various people but there’s a lot of good stuff if you read till the end. If you’re reading this and you’re already in college or passed through college please feel free to add your own advice in the comments!

Relationship with God

Be careful in college. From first-hand experience, I know what it’s like when the friends in your dorm are going to a party and you don’t want to be left alone so you go along, even if you do decide not to “party.” Being in such an environment can taint you. It tainted me. I haven’t been keeping up with God’s Word, I’ve been going to parties, and I have been lying to myself. Worst of all, I am a representative of Christ, but I myself am not acting Christ-like.College is dangerous for the spirit and the Devil is thriving in college.I need to constantly remind myself that I am not of this world and that the world and its evils, regardless of how tempting, should not prevail over me. 

If you already have a relationship-solid or building with God, keep your faith and spirituality strong from day one. College is the perfect atmosphere for you to be tested and fall prey to the devil’s workings. I am telling you, if you get caught up in a bad situation just once, it could be the downfall of your entire college career depending on how you recover.

It is very important, from the very first day that you remember that you made it to university by the grace of God.  There are many out there that would give their right arm to be in your shoes so putting God first is a must.  Being the only Black student in my program was a challenge but by HIS grace, I stood out academically.  So what did I do to maintain my Christian principles in college? I went to church, became involved with Christian ministries, and had a weekly Bible study with my friends on Thursday.  I think that the Bible study was the best because it moved me closer to God while also discussing His word with my friends/peers. Even if people began to drop from it like flies always stay true to the one-hour or so for Bible study.  Remember that this is not to take the place of your daily devotions.  Daily devotions are with you and God only!  Always set a time that you want to be with God daily and stick to that time.

Relationship with People.

Roommates & Friends

– Don’t be quick to call everyone your friend
Not to say that everyone isn’t nice, but it’s easy to label everyone you meet as your friend simply because you guys (other freshmen) are all in the same situation — new place, no friends, etc.. Despite this, you still have to be conscious of the people you are calling your friends. Seriously get to know people because you can’t know whether a person will have your back or not based on 15-second encounter at an orientation activity or a party. I have seen too many situations where people get locked in a friend group the first few days of freshman year, then after a month or so find out that these people are horrible friends. I’m not saying be a loner, by all means you have to put yourself out there and meet a lot of people to keep your sanity!! I’m just saying don’t get super close to people, sharing all your deepest secrets and family problems, after only three days. You don’t want to be “best friends” with that girl who always gets disgustingly drunk and throws up everywhere while you swear to other people that “she’s a nice person when sober”. Or that person whose friend is always pressuring them to neglect their work. Overall being cautious about who you let into your inner circle of friends helps you keep your life relatively drama-free because by the time you settle into a core group of friends, you’ll know that they are good people who share your interests of being a successful student and won’t cause you to get into trouble.
-Test the field with friendships from day one by “feeling everyone out.” Get to know everyone as soon as possible, as deeply as possible. The 50 friends you have in the fall semester will soon become your 5 friends by spring semester. Hang out with the smart people/the geeks. Now definitely make relationships with the athletes, Greeks, and musicians, but make friendships with people who will help you get somewhere, be it during the summertime or after college….people who will not forget you when the meet someone who is in your field/someone who could be your future boss. If you have a random roommate your first year, be their friends.  Go out on roommate dates…explore the city. Leave your “real” friends out and just enjoy people who would not ordinarily hang out with.With that said…lay ground rules for your room: Are you willing to share your food/snacks?What is the room visitor policy… how long can they stay? Etc.

-Definitely you will end up liking someone during your first year of school.  The key to this is to stick to your principles – do not lower your standards.  Do not allow any boy or girl to destroy your relationship with God.  Now, does this mean that you cannot date? Course not, however there should be no compromising to make the other person feel good or to please the other person in any way.  Abstinence is key.  Despite the many diseases of the world, which are never written on anyone’s face, you just need to preserve yourself according to God’s words.  The way to do so is to find a person/mate who has the same outlook on things.  When you are not in the same frame of mind the tendency to do what you don’t want to do is there.  Keep a circle of friends that will inspire you for the Lord.

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